I have always believed that even as a wife and mother I still need to have something for me. That one thing that takes away stress, puts a smile on your face and makes you a better person. I have always loved being in the gym, lifting weights, doing cardio and running. I do believe that as we become mothers it is very easy for us to push our needs aside and give up on what makes us feel good. A few years ago I went through a phase where I felt like I was doing nothing to contribute to our family. I felt as though I had no purpose because I didn’t work and I had nothing that was my own.
I felt like I needed to be working because I wanted my children to see that you have to work for things in life. I started working at a skin care clinic, I was super happy because I loved the job and the people I worked with. How ever I quickly grew upset, I was missing out on everything to do with my kids. I had always been home with them, did all their field trips, school shows, playdates. I was missing out on everything with them, I had to schedule parent teacher meetings before I started work in the morning. My kids were upset and constantly said they missed me and wanted me home more. I noticed how much didn’t get done when I wasn’t on them to do homework and chores etc. It really affected Sophia, she would cry and be upset when I came home. Telling me she missed me so much and didn’t want me to go to work. I was gone from 8:30am to 7:30pm some days. I started realizing how much I did at home with them, how much of a purpose I had at home.
During all of this my husband still working non stop from home, plus taking care of the kids. Picking them up from school everyday, doing dinners, always having the house clean and dinner made for me when I came home. He put all his work trips on hold because I wanted to work. We tried a live in nanny and that turned into a nightmare situation. That’s when I realized that my job was to be at home and be a mom. I didn’t want a nanny doing everything with my kids. I wanted to do it, being a mom was enough for me! These are my babies that I love more than life, I want to be there for everything that they do.
When I stopped working, I remember being so happy the first week. Just to be able to see my kids all day, everyday. To hear their crazy stories. listen to their giggles, even their fights. They were so happy, and they kept saying how excited they were that I was home. I could finally take them to parks and swimming and for hikes again. Of course some days are hard, but I wouldn’t give any of it up. These 4 crazies make my life what it is today, amazing! I am so lucky to have these wonderful children call me mom. They are all unique and special and all have different talents. Teaching them daily little life lessons, and then seeing them use the tools I give them. Or hearing from a teacher that they are amazing children, that’s what makes me know that being a mom is enough. I will accomplish more raising my kids then I ever will if I’m working full-time.
My kids will always be able to say that I was there for them. That I showed up to everything they ever did and encouraged all they wanted to do. As they get older and I see them turning into pre teens, I realize just how amazing they really are. I still manage to make the time to get to the gym 5 days a week. Which in turn makes me a better mother, I feel good about myself and release stress. Just because you are a stay at home mom, does not mean that you can’t do things for yourself. You have a huge purpose, you are raising little humans, who count on you for everything. I’ve realized that balancing being a mom with some me time, makes me happy. As long as I can get to the gym, I feel good and I can continue to be a good mom. Even if it’s 20 mins a day to have a relaxing bath or read your favourite magazine. Take those few minutes, it will make a world of difference for you. You will notice yourself becoming happier each day, dealing with the arguing of the kids just a little bit better than yesterday. Always tell yourself that you are amazing, and you have an incredibly important job. Who cares if you didn’t get your entire to do list done, or your house is messy. If you have happy kids, who are fed and have a roof over there head and know that they are loved. Then you are winning at parenting! You as a mom are enough! You always will be!